Parenting and The Gift of Time

"The greatest gift our Father gives us is His presence. The greatest gift we can give our children is ours." 

Parenting.  It's a sensitive subject and there are a vast number of opinions on the topic.  I've shared my opinions and parenting style of choice in blog posts past.  

I've made my fair share of parenting blunders.  I've done a lot wrong, but I would like to think I've done more right.    There will always be areas I wish I had handled a situation differently, spoken a little more softly, reacted a little less abruptly, etc.  But I don't believe in living in regret.  Regret will eat you up, rob you of today, the present, and the gift of the now in front of you.  Don't live in regrets.  Trust me on that one.

So, instead of regret, I look at how I can do things differently going forward.  This is where the opening quote struck me right between the eyes.

How many times has one of my girls wanted my undivided attention and I responded to them, "just a minute, I'm busy," "I need to make this phone call," "we'll do that tomorrow,"  "you can tell me later," or "not right now, I've got laundry, dishes, dinner, etc to do."  My younger daughter often asks me to watch a show with her.  I oblige her request with my physical presence, but I sit there and scroll through social media sites on my phone or answer e-mails from my laptop.  She comments.  I make excuses.  Eventually she stopped asking.  Sigh.

When my girls were younger, I was a fanatic about my house being clean.  If it wasn't clean I got grouchy (ok, some things haven't changed)...having a clean house and everything in order was my priority.  In hindsight I wish I would've ignored the sink full of dishes, dusty baseboards and piles of laundry and spent a little more time on the floor coloring, playing Polly Pockets, Thomas the Train, and dress up.

I heard a statistic (I don't know the source)  this generation of teens is the loneliest, most depressed generation ever.  After spending some time with this generation, I can testify to these facts.  In our busyness we've left behind the fundamentals of family time, dinner around the table and other relational family activities.  We've lost our relational connectedness as a result.

Father God is always available.  He doesn't have to check His calendar or pencil us in.  If I have something I want to share with Him or talk about, He is there and the best listener I know!  As I have stated in previous posts on parenting, I want Father God to be my parenting model.  

I want to listen more to my girls and comment less.  I want to disconnect from social media, ministry and the "to-do list" long enough to be completely and totally PRESENT for them.  I want to give them the gift of my time...because let's be honest, time is a gift, not a commodity we can buy.  

No matter what your parenting style, I think we can agree, time is something all children need.  Are you giving your children the gift of your presence?  If not, start today!

Known for Love

I've been thinking about something.  Uh-oh, there she goes thinking again:)  As I realize God's perfect love more and more, I just can't get away from it's simplicity, yet complexity.  Obviously, we've made it very complex, because if the body of Christ had an accurate and deep understanding of God's love I am convinced we would be living differently.

The Gospel of Christ is ridiculously good news!  So good, I think we have a hard time embracing just how good it is.  God's love comes with no strings or stipulations, why do we add them???  We go back to religious mindsets and mix old covenant law with new covenant reality.  There is such a burning desire in my heart to teach and impart the good news of the new covenant to everyone I know.

As I've written previously, the body of Christ impaling the body of Christ grieves me...DEEPLY!!!!  Honestly, there's not a day goes by I don't think of it and pray about it and look for ways to bring about reconciliation.  There are times I have considered taking a sabbatical from Facebook, merely because of posts that I feel are grossly misrepresenting my Jesus to a broken world.

What if, just what if, your only job as a follower of Christ was to love people?  I can hear the question now, what about the Truth?  What about what we stand for on topics such as same sex marriage, abortion, etc?  I get that, people.  I really, really do!  I believe marriage is one man and one woman.  I believe that abortion is murder.  But, seriously, it's not my place to impose my standards (which are derived from the Bible) on those who don't even believe in my God.  To quote the Bible at a person who doesn't believe in Jesus is utterly silly.

I go back to Romans 2:4 that it is His kindness that leads to repentance.  Repentance isn't wailing and crying for hours and hours proclaiming how sinful you are before the Lord, begging for His mercy.  Repentance is changing the way you think.  Turning from your worldly or sinful thought/belief in exchange for His.  Something like, "Father, I have believed a lie and I have made bad choices based on this belief.  I am truly sorry.  I receive Your forgiveness.  I choose to believe Your truth today."

Here lately, I can not get away from the Gandhi quote, "I like your Christ.  I do not like your Christians.  Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."

You know what?  The Ten Commandments are still valid.  We are no longer under the law, but that doesn't make the law invalid.  Instead of worrying about people keeping the laws, what if we focused on the one law Jesus said was most important?  The law of love which is; love God, love others as you love yourself.

Henry Lewis Drummond wrote the following in 1890:

'If you love, you will unconsciously fulfill the whole law.  You can readily see for yourselves how that must be so.  Take any of the commandments. "Thou shalt have no other gods before me."  If a man loves God, you will not need to tell him to put away other gods.  Love is the fulfilling of that law.  "Take not the Lord's name in vain."  Would a man ever dream of taking the Lord's name in vain if he loved Him? "Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy."  Wouldn't a man be glad to have one day in seven to dedicate more exclusively to the object of his affection?  Love would fulfill all these laws regarding God.

In the same way, if a man loves others, you would never think of telling him to honor his father and mother.  He could not do anything else.  It would be preposterous to tell him not to kill.  He could not do anything else.  You could only insult him if you suggested that he should not steal-how could he steal from those he loved?  It would be superfluous to beg him not to bear false witness against his neighbor.  If he loved him it would be the last thing he would do.  And you would never dream of urging him not to covet what his neighbor had.  He would rather they processed it than himself.  In this way "love is the fulfilling of the law."  It is the rule for fulfilling all rules, the new commandment for keeping all the old commandments, Christ's one secret of the Christian life.'


Jonathan Welton says, "the difficultly of developing this type of lifestyle is that we must have our eyes focused not on a list of rules, but upon walking in love in our relationships."


The deeper I go in God's love the less I am tempted to break one of these laws.  Does that mean I am sinless?  NO!  When I do sin it's because I have left the truth of God's love.  Sin is a counterfeit way to get a need met.  When sin is present it is just an indication of an area where God's love needs to be received.  The grace of God empowers us to walk free from sin!

So, what's my point of this blog post?  Simple.  As believers I think we should take the words of Jesus to heart and start loving others.  If we were truly and accurately representing our Savior our churches would be full to max capacity.  The lost would be flocking to Jesus.

Body of Christ, it's time to stop hating and debating.  It's time to start representing our Father with excellence.  It's time to get over our divisions and disagreements and focus on the one thing that matters.  Jesus, oh sweet Jesus, Your love is amazing!

So, the next time you are tempted at work, on social media or wherever else you find yourself 'taking a stand for Jesus' by proclaiming what you are against perhaps try developing a relationship with someone who needs Jesus.  That girl who just had abortion, she doesn't need to hear how wrong it was.  She needs to know the love and forgiveness of Jesus so she won't make the same choice again.

My Soul Sings because I live in the new covenant and the Gospel of grace is such good news!!!!!  Help us, Jesus, become a people of relationship.  I want to be known for love and representing You well!

I won't try to fix you

When I stop, seek and listen, He almost always speaks. It's the stopping and seeking part I've struggled with the last few weeks. Feeling disconnected from fellowship with my Maker is not a feeling I like, but alas, I find myself in that place from time to time. I certainly know how to get out, but it sometimes 'feels' like I'm too far gone or the problem I'm facing is too big...there it is, that word 'feels.' Just a reminder we can't navigate this Christian walk based on our feelings...they often misrepresent the truth:)

Yesterday was not a good day for me and it was Easter, so I hated all the more the yuckiness I felt in my heart. I like peace and peace was far from me. Knowing I wasn't going to magically be delivered from my pit of despair without divine intervention (and me purposing to ask Him for help) I sent a close friend a message briefly outlining my woes and asking for prayer.

My short take on Galatians 6:2 is we sometimes need a brother or sister in Christ to bear our burdens when we can't seem to carry them to Jesus on our own. We aren't meant to carry them, but give them to Him in exchange for His easy yoke...but there have been times in my life I haven't had the strength to even bring them to His feet...I have experienced someone taking (bearing) it on my behalf; truly a beautiful experience.

Back to my request for prayer...this was a friend who knows me and knows me well. She has earned the right to speak into my life and I hers. We have trust. We have relationship. She responded, as I would expect from her, with a short message of "got it."

This morning she sent me some advice about the situation. Good advice. I agreed with it, actually the same advice I had given to others in the past. I tried to ignore the fact it was bothering me, but it wasn't going away. After a blissful morning seeking the Lord, I heard Him.

"It bothers you because it feels like she is trying to fix you. You don't need fixing, you need intercession, love and support." There it was...He was right on...Holy Spirit is BRILLIANT, you know;) I made a mental note to be more clear when requesting prayer in the future to state what I need, even prefacing my request with a 'I'm not looking for advice here, I just need your prayers and love.'

Of course the revelation didn't end here! There's always the look in the mirror He seems to ask me to make. In His sweet Daddy God voice, "Amy, you've been the fixer when others needed you to just listen and pray too." Of course I have! OUCH!!!!

Many readers don't know me personally, but many of you do...so, consider this a public apology if I have ever made you feel like I was trying to fix you. It's in my DNA to want to help people. After all it's why I life coach. I have even received a prophetic word that I am a problem solver. Because of this call and strong desire to help others, I have to be diligent not to step over the line from friend/confidant to fixer:) Sometimes people come to me for advice, but many times they just want someone to listen and love them where they are; a safe place, free from judgment and criticism.

As I was pondering this revelation and application to my life personally, I kept hearing the Cold Play song Fix You over and over in my head. I finally pulled it up on YouTube and listened to it several times. I've always liked the song. I know a little of the background of why it was written. Basically, it's about a person who wants to save someone they love from pain. The lyric 'I will try to fix you' reverberated in my spirit all morning.

How many people have I tried to fix? Out of love? Sometimes. Out of a need to control? Possibly. Because I once believed it was my job? Maybe.

He wanted me to share this in a blog. Why? I'm not sure. Perhaps someone is reading this and you feel stuck trying to fix someone in your life and you are frustrated because it's not working...friend, it's not suppose to work. It's not my job, or your job, to fix anyone. Our responsibility is us. Work on you and give others the best you, you've got. Work on loving, not fixing, and remember, love listens...are you listening?

My soul is singing as I type this because now I am more free to love and listen. While I'm listening I'm going to purpose to ask others what they need and in turn communicate my needs more plainly. When people come to me with issues, I will ask them, "what do you need?" I've even asked my teen, "are you wanting advice, or for me to just listen?" Sometimes she wants advice, but many times she just wants me to listen. I can do that:)

When others come to me in times of distress I want them to encounter Jesus... because He is the only ONE capable of fixing anybody!

I am smiling as I realize my mountain that seemed larger than life yesterday doesn't seem so big now, I just needed heavenly perspective on it...which came in my quiet time this morning...and, in the process, He gave me an upgrade and revelation on a topic I wasn't even aware I needed an upgrade in...ha! Papa God, you have an amazing sense of humor...oh, how I love YOU!

Wives, let's talk about SEX!

I'm giving this blog post a MW rating for "married women." This post will contain mature content intended for women who are married, or about to get married:)

Warning, if you're a TMI* offends me type of person you might want to fore go reading this one...but you're also probably one who needs to read it the most.

As women of faith we've got to get a hold of this one, girls! Forget religiosity and let's get honest. Marriage is under fire! We don't need to be reminded of the divorce rates and the statistics showing the rates are just as high, if not higher, among believers as non-believers. The world is looking to the body of Christ for answers and solutions, but we can't give them when we are just as ensnared in the problem as the rest of the world! What's part of answer? Hey, it may be ALL of the answer...SEX, healthy, God glorifying, marriage enriching, SEX!

I could spend time talking about how God created sex for a husband and wife. I could talk about how the enemy has perverted sex or how our mindsets are skewed on the subject because of media, pop culture, music, etc. But, that's been done already and, really, is it getting us anywhere? I am a find a solution type of girl...after all, the problems have been well identified.

So for this one, let's agree to talk like close girl friends. Wives, I'm hear to tell you to give it up and give it up often! Yes, I just went there! Seriously, every three days is what experts tell us men need!

I can hear the excuses flying through cyberspace as I type this....girls, I've made them myself. I tried the "not tonight, the baby was really clingy today and I'm all touched out." Then the babies became a tween and teen and bedtimes aren't 7:00 anymore and the excuse became, "we can't do that; the girls might walk in on us."

Then, of course, there's the excuse my emotional needs weren't being met, so why meet his physical ones. If only he would...you fill in the blank. It doesn't matter the excuse, they are all rubbish. EXCUSES WON'T IMPROVE YOUR MARRIAGE AND THEY DEFINITELY WON'T SAVE IT!!!!!!

I don't have all the answers as to why God made men so sexual, but He did and we can either whine about it or embrace it. I'm hear to encourage you to embrace it.

Now, let's get a couple of things out in the open...as if this post wasn't open enough! First, I'm not perfect in this department. Second, I want you to know this message is to women in safe marital relationships. If you are being sexually or physically abused, get help and get help now.

My Soul Sings is a place where I get personal with you and this post is more personal than most. I must tell you, sex is the ticket to getting your needs met. Some might read that and think I am a proponent of manipulation. I am not. I detest manipulation. I would like to invite you to see it as sacrificial and unconditional.

Wait a second, Amy...you just said sex was the ticket to getting your needs met and turned around and used the words sacrificial and unconditional? The word unconditional by definition contradicts this statement. Yes, you are right, it does. Let me explain...

If you are a wife whose emotional needs aren't being met, it would be a sacrificial act of unconditional love on your part to meet the needs of your husband physically. Unconditional love is love with no strings attached.

Which brings me to what I must say next. If you want your way I'm here to tell you griping, complaining and berating your man isn't the way to get it. You're only making the gap between the two of you larger and larger. I've met some couples where the gap is so wide it takes a great commitment and hours of counseling to bridge it...sadly, many end in divorce because the gap seemed to large to bridge. After years of decay they opt out because they want relief from the pain and years of needs going unmet.

No amount of browbeating will bring about positive change in anyone. A negative on top of a negative doesn't equal a positive. That's a whole other topic for another day:)

So, what if...just what if, regular tumbling between the sheets brings out the best in your man? You'll never know, if you don't give it a try.

I'm chuckling at what I'm about to share with you. My sweet hubby gets used as an example so many times. He's good with it. I'll even read this post to him later.

This past weekend the girls weren't home. We had some things to accomplish around the house and also planned a date night. Life is incredibly busy right now and I love it when we make it a point to spend time together. If you're familiar with the 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman you can probably tell quality time is one of my love languages. I also blossom with words of affirmation and acts of service.

Russell spent Saturday afternoon taking the blinds down in each room of our house. He took them outside, washed them and hung them back up. He also cleaned all the windows, from the inside and the outside. This was his idea. I hadn't asked him to do it. SCORE! This would be an act of service.

Saturday night we had dinner with some friends at a lovely restaurant overlooking the Tennessee River. SCORE! This would be quality time.

We came home, snuggled and (use your imagination here:) SCORE! This would be physical touch.

Sunday morning came and he informed me he had picked up a gerber daisy (my favorite flower) and potted it for my table on the patio where I sit in the mornings to enjoy coffee and quiet time. SCORE! This would be receiving of gifts.

Later in the morning he looked at me with loving eyes and told me how awesome I was. SCORE! This would be words of affirmation.

He was one happy pappy. His needs were met, my needs were met....and the whole family benefits from the atmosphere of love in the house. This also brings security to our children. It sends the message mom loves dad and dad loves mom...we are safe.

What I don't want you to take from this post is you can be a vixen in the bedroom tonight and expect diamonds and roses tomorrow. It takes time and consistency, but it's so worth it!

A dear friend and I were talking about sex the other day. She said, "Amy, to them (our hubbys) sex is like oxygen." It's true. Obviously we can not live without oxygen...perhaps to the male species, they can't "live" without sex. All I know is my hubby is tends to be less frustrated, more at peace and generally more pleasant when we are having sex regularly.

I may sound like a broken record, but again, you are only in control of you. You can only control how you respond to life's situations and challenges. A healthier, more fulfilled you is on the horizon as soon as you stop looking to others to meet your needs. It can start with letting your husband off the hook. Will you take the first step? Will you make the sacrifice? You might possibly end up enjoying it!

For those in sexual bondage or suffering with guilt from their sexual past, there is help and there is healing. Sexual sin is almost always the fruit of a deeper rooted issue...a way to medicate the pain or unmet need. If you struggle in any of these areas, I invite you to check out the inner healing ministries offered here.

If you've enjoyed this post and would like to read others like it go here, here, here and here.

I only issue challenges I'm willing to take myself...girls, let's do this one together! My Soul Sings because God thought it not good for man to be alone so He gave him woman. Embracing my role as wife, encourager, life giver, friend and most importantly, LOVER!

*TMI-acronym for too much information

Grace for the Process

Wanted to hop on here and share with you a prayer Papa laid on my heart yesterday. It's a prayer I believe if we all prayed it, there would be a fountain of grace flowing more freely in the body of Christ.

I am not saying there is a lack of grace on heaven's part, but I think we have to be mindful that we have freely received grace for ourselves and it's time to freely give it to others as well. We need to be grace givers, not just grace receivers.

In life we are going to have conflict with others. Misunderstandings and offense are inevitable. Unless you live with your head in a hole, it's going to happen. I am at a point in my life where I want to use each opportunity to grow and become more like my Papa. Instead of avoiding or running from difficult situations, I want to meet them head on, in a spirit of love and grace. This is what I refer to as process. I am in process and everyone I come into contact with is in process...some are embracing the process and others are running from it:)

Graham Cooke refers to people in our lives that are difficult, needy or abrasive as grace growers. I have some grace growers in my life and I am sure you do too. Boundaries are necessary with your grace growers, but it's important not to completely shut them out because by doing so you will miss a wonderful opportunity to "grow in the Lord."

When we take offense and pick up our toys and move elsewhere we are just setting ourselves up to be introduced to more grace growers. He will continue to give us opportunity to grow up. It doesn't matter if the environment is different, the process is the same. Truth is, when we move, our junk goes with us...the same areas that need His touch and healing don't go away with new territory...you might as well deal with them where you are and save yourself some time and additional heartache!

For example, maybe you have a pattern of having issues with your boss. You think changing jobs is the solution, only to find the same issues surfacing within a few months in your new environment. Could it be possible, perhaps, YOU have an issue...maybe with authority? We can't control other people and we are only responsible for ourselves...so, take a look in the mirror. Allow Holy Spirit to shine His light on YOUR heart. Ask yourself the hard question...could I be part of the problem? Work on changing YOU and watch what God will do in your environments. It doesn't mean you won't have issues, but you will have His perspective and handling them with a goal toward solution will be possible with heaven backing you up!

So, the prayer He gave me was simply this, "Papa, help me to give myself grace in my process and give me grace for others in their process as well."

Yes, grace for my own process is important, because I have a tendency to beat myself up when I handle things less than "perfect." He isn't mad at me, therefore, I shouldn't be mad at myself. Who doesn't need more grace?

The day I realized I was trying to make people earn the grace I received for free was a day MY SOUL truly learned how to SING!

If you enjoy reading My Soul Sings please become a follower of this blog and consider sharing it with a friend! Blessings on you!

My Heart Song

Hello, blogland! It's been a long time. I certainly haven't been at a loss for words, but I must admit I haven't felt like blogging for quite some time. To be honest I've not wanted to share what has been on my heart.

I consider myself to be transparent because I have nothing to hide, but quite honestly I have felt misunderstood by people who don't really "know" me. As I touched on in the Passionate about Purpose series to know someone indicates a very intimate relationship. We all have a number of people in our day to day lives, but how many of those people really know us and vice versa? I have a select few I feel really know the song of my heart. They are safe. I can trust them with my heart. It doesn't mean we have to agree on everything, but there is safety in expressing who we really are without any pretenses or expectations. These are the type of friends who if they heard gossip about me would be able to say, "no, I know Amy Dover and that's not her heart."

Out of obedience to my Papa I feel it is time to break my silence. However, I want to reiterate what I stated when I began this blog. I'm not looking for doctrinal arguments. I'm not trying to change how you think. This post and the posts to follow won't take the tone of instruction, teaching or a theological stance. In fact, Jesus doesn't even want me to use much scripture...He said to simply share my story and my heart because through it He wants to release hope to the hopeless.

Jesus often offended the religious leaders of His day. He came and totally turned over their apple-carts so to speak. Sometimes I take stances on issues that aren't mainstream...perhaps even offending some. I believe this has caused me to be misunderstood many times. I will admit this rejection has hurt, but I'm not sorry for standing for what I believe to be His heart.

Recently a friend sent me an encouraging text. In it she said Jesus said to tell you...and she went on to share what He had given her to share. Funny thing is, He had already told me the same word. Not only had He told me, He had told me several times, in several different ways (through song, sermons and scripture)...I like to believe it's because He loves me and knows I need lots of confirmation=)

I read her text and chuckled. I said aloud, "Jesus, okay I get that, I hear You. But I just want them to know my heart." You see, I had already searched my heart on the issue and knew it was pure. I was not prepared for what He said back to me...He said, "Don't you think I want them to know mine?" Wow! Talk about putting my little pity party into perspective! Jesus, the King of kings, is misunderstood? Of course He is! If the planet took the time to get to know Him and know His heart they would fall madly, deeply, passionately in love with Him!

I have spent the past several months seeking His heart and He has not disappointed me. He is revealing His heart to me on many issues. I've got to admit, it's not popular opinion the things He has shown me. Imagine that, Jesus goes against the status quo=)

So, if you're interested in having a front row seat into the beat of my heart, stick around...He has told me to give you a glimpse into His heart, through mine. I'm not saying I have all the answers, or that I have this Christianity thing all figured out, because I do NOT...but what I do have I will share and that is simply a love relationship with Papa, Jesus and Holy Spirit. A relational connection so tight I struggle very little with fear and fear use to consume me. I have peace which I have no explanation for other than Jesus, Jesus, Jesus! It doesn't mean I don't have problems, struggles or sin...it means I know my identity in Christ and I wake up each day with something to celebrate because I have learned to live on earth as it is in heaven. My Soul Sings and it's my prayer your soul is singing too...Stay tuned!

Passionate about Purpose Part III

Welcome back to our Passionate about Purpose series. This is part three of our journey. If you are just now joining us hop on down to the first post in the series and read up.

In short review, in our last post we learned striving is a nasty word. We took a brief look at what drives us to strive and how our worth is NOT found in what we do.

Today we are going to discuss what leads to ministry burnout. In our first post I posed several questions to you. One of them was, "Are you, or have you, felt burnout in the area of ministry or Christian service?" If the answer was "yes", hopefully, today's post will shed some light and give you a direction in which to move.

As Christians I believe we all come to a point in our lives where we ask the question, "is this all there is?" If we are honest with ourselves, and each other, most of us have thought it and some of us have even verbalized it. Of course, with this thought comes a good deal of guilt, shame and condemnation. After all, He gave us the greatest gift imaginable, shouldn't we find pure joy in serving Him? The answer is "YES!" Serving Him should be pure joy....so why is it not for many?

Presence and overflow. Two key words which should be at the top of your Christian vocabulary list....way before the word service or servant. In this post we will focus on presence.

I have often said, "without the presence of God we can just all go home." What I mean by this statement is if we aren't hosting the presence of God in our life, especially in the area of Christian service, what we are doing is basically worthless. You might get the best Amy I have, but if His presence isn't on it, the best Amy is useless.

Let's see if I can make this a little clearer...can you think of a time you were in a church service, perhaps a weekend retreat or conference and the atmosphere felt absolutely lifeless? The music was good, the preaching or teaching was average, but something just seemed to be missing? I certainly have experienced this, in fact, most of my life I would say this was my opinion of church and church functions. You go to church and you go to these functions because it's what "good" Christians do, but it's not because they put a fire in your belly, it's because you feel obligated. This my friends is going through the motions. There came a time in my life I recognized there had to be more than this. The God I read about in the Bible simply wasn't this lifeless and boring! Jesus came so we could have life, abundant life (John 10:10.)

After being under the power and presence of God, I can now recognize when the Spirit has left the "building." I love the book by R.T. Kendall, "Sensitivity to the Spirit." He tells of the story in the Bible where Mary and Joseph have been to Jerusalem for the Feast of the Passover. On their way back Mary and Joseph realize Jesus is not with them...it took them three days to realize this!!!! Now, we might read this story and think that is crazy...THREE DAYS! Would it take you three days to realize your child wasn't with you? Pastor Kendall likens this to the Dove (Holy Spirit.) How many times have we moved on in ministry, a church service, etc. without the presence of the Dove? Stuck in our routines, relying on our talents and the Dove has left the building and we don't even notice!

I really haven't done the subject of hosting the presence justice. How can I describe in a few words the magnitude of the power of His presence? I hope you will dig deeper in this subject and I pray Holy Spirit brings you wisdom and revelation...He, after all, is the very best teacher!

So, what is the cure for ministry burnout? I hope you are seeing the answer...it's His presence, but it's also overflow.

What is overflow? I am so glad you asked:) Overflow is the result of spending time in His presence, at His feet, in His lap, in the secret place with Him. When we seek Him we are promised in Scripture we will find Him (Jer. 29:13.) This is your greatest purpose as a child of the King! You were created to worship and love Him. If this is ALL you ever did, you will have fulfilled your highest calling.

In our next post we will discuss this purpose in greater detail and how if we live in a place of worship and overflow, serving Him is a natural by-product! Doesn't that sound wonderful and liberating? Serving Him is a natural by-product of spending time with Him!!!!!

Yes, we have made it harder than He ever designed it to be! Isn't He brilliant? If we would just slow down and seek Him life would be far more rewarding and enjoyable!

If you have spent any significant amount of time here at "My Soul Sings" you will recognize I am a proponent of experiencing God. I fully believe we were made to experience His goodness, power, love and grace in a tangible way. I also value His Word. It is both His written Word (logos) and His spoken word (rhema) that empowers me to walk in His presence and in His power. I have a tangible God. We are instructed to "taste and see He is good" (Psalm 34:8.)

Maybe you are hesitant to "experience" God. I am not here to change your mind, but to share my story of how He changed me and brought me into abundant life. Walking in lifeless religion, void of relationship and experience, didn't work for me...so I leave you with the question, "how's it working for you?" Yep, think about that one...

Until next time, I pray He reveals Himself to you as deep cries out to deep...your soul longs for Him. My Soul Sings because I have found what, no Who, it was crying out for...you can too!

If you enjoy reading My Soul Sings please become a follower of this blog and consider sharing it with a friend! Blessings on you!

Passionate about Purpose Part II

Woo-hoo, my life has been full lately! What about yours? Happy to report the home church we are helping to start had it's first service last week and God blew us away...but, He always does when you are submitted to Him. Thank You, Jesus for such an opportunity. Normally today I would be ministering but I have the day off and I am so glad to get around to blogging! YAY!

In our first post about Passion and Purpose we asked some questions. We started to break down Psalm 46:10 and learned striving is truly the "s" word:) Briefly, we discussed how God desires us to be His friends and lovers, not just servants. It is from our relationship with Him that we serve from the overflow. If you haven't read the first post, I suggest you start there, because these posts are building upon each other.

Today we are going to take a look at what drives us to strive. I say "a look" because I can't begin to cover the roots of striving completely. I can only really share from what I have personally experienced.

As I said in the previous post, striving denotes a "doing" mentality. When we put our focus on "doing" instead of His presence, we fall into the Martha trap. If you are unfamiliar with the story of Mary and Martha in the Bible I suggest you read Luke 10:38-42. I recently heard a pastor say if you are in a Martha season, by all means, get out! Jesus rebuked Martha twice!

I once was Martha. When I hosted a gathering at my home perfection was the goal, details reigned supreme and I would bit your head off (just ask my husband and children) if you walked through the kitchen. Instead of focusing on creating an atmosphere of love for my guests I created one of tension and stress. As Jesus said to Martha, "Martha, Martha, you are worried about and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her."

Pastor Bill Johnson teaches on the importance of not putting principles over the presence (of God.) Principles are good and necessary for order, but shouldn't take precedence over hosting the presence of God. It's in the presence of God where people are touched, transformed, healed and loved!

So, what might gear a person toward being a Martha instead of a Mary, toward striving instead of serving from overflow? For me it was driven out of a need to please and perform for the approval of others. I had to be the best at what I did...sadly, it didn't matter how much collateral damage there was in the process. Needing approval of others is just the surface of what fuels this kind of behavior. Unworthiness is a nasty beast driving this "striving" and "doing" mentality as well. Maybe if I do my best I can be worthy of love and acceptance. This is placing our value in what we do, not who we are in Christ.

God loves you for you. Period. When we try to "work" for His approval we are in essence saying His grace wasn't enough for us....and how prideful is that?!? Do you think what Jesus did on the cross was enough? The deceiver works overtime to keep us believing the lie we are unworthy. What I am about to say is strong and I don't say it to condemn...but really, when we say we aren't worth the sacrifice Christ made we are calling Him a liar...because, Beloved, He said you were worthy enough for Him to die for. Is your sin so bad that He needs to go back onto the cross and suffer it all again? Of course not....so, why do we live with a cloud of shame and unworthiness? Hopefully we can shed some light on this topic in the future.

Perhaps you have struggled with unworthiness (I haven't met anyone who hasn't at one time, me included.) When we are shrouded in a cloud of unworthiness we believe He couldn't possibly want to spend time with us....so we neglect spending time with Him and our hearts become empty...then we take our empty hearts and try to "serve" Him...which is the pre-cursor to ministry burn out. Which is where we will pick up next time!

In the meantime might I encourage you to seek the Lord if you struggle with the ungodly belief you are unworthy. If you find value in what you do, instead of who Christ's makes you, ask Jesus where the ungodly root is. Start with this prayer or something like it:

"Father God, You created me for relationship with You. To be in Your presence and to serve from a place of presence. I have struggled with striving and have tried to earn Your grace. I confess I have believed the lie I was not worthy and denied Your gift of grace and the work of the cross. Jesus, Your blood makes me worthy. I receive Your robe of righteousness. Father, help me. Show me areas in my heart where there are lies I am believing about how You feel about me. I want to receive everything You have for me. I want to walk in FREEDOM and JOY and serve from the OVERFLOW of my relationship with YOU! Thank You, Papa, You give me only good gifts. Thank You for Your grace. I love You!"

Now turn your eyes toward heaven....listen....He is going to talk to your spirit. Write it down and meditate on what He reveals to you.

Serving from a heart of overflow, hosting His presence which brings the kingdom of heaven to earth makes MY SOUL SING! Lalalalalala, can you hear it singing? Yours can sing too!

If you enjoy reading My Soul Sings please become a follower of this blog and consider sharing it with a friend! Blessings on you!

Passionate about Purpose

Remember those old time arcade games? My aunt and uncle had one in their basement when I was a child. You would pull back on the lever, let go quickly and watch the metal ball be propelled up the chute and back down as gravity pulled it, hitting sensors as it went, full of accompanying sounds and lights as you pushed the button which flipped the bars trying to prevent the ball from going into the gutter. That pretty much describes what is going on in my head right now with this post...so many directions it could go, so many holes it could fall into, some scoring more points then others...Excuse me a moment while the ball lands at its destination...Holy Spirit come, wisdom and revelation come. Okay, here we go....

This will be a series, not sure how many posts. I have much to say on the topic and I don't want to overwhelm you. Let's start with taking an inventory on where you stand on the subject of purpose by asking a few questions:

1. What were you created for?

2. Do you feel you are walking in what you were created for?

3. Do you struggle with feeling like there should be something more to life?

4. Do you feel incomplete?

5. Are you frustrated or confused in the area of purpose or calling?

6. Are you, or have you, felt burnout in the area of ministry or Christian service?

7. Do you say "yes" to things out of a sense of obligation?

8. Do you find identity in what you do? In other words, does "doing" make you feel significant or valuable?

There was a time when looking at these questions would have made me feel hopeless. My answers would have been:

1. I have no idea

2. No, obviously, since I have no idea.

3. Yes, all the time.

4. Are we allowed to feel complete?

5. Yes and Yes

6. YES!!!

7. YES and guilty when I had the guts to say no.

8. Identity? What the heck is identity?

Like the majority of the body of Christ, I believed I was made to serve. I mean, after all, this great big God sent His one and only Son to die for me, a wormy wretch, shouldn't I spend the rest of my life serving Him? If this is where your thoughts end on the subject, you may have been missing out on the greatest relationship of your life. If you have accepted the lesser of your identity as "servant"as the end of the line you have been missing out on the opportunity to walk in the greater part of your identity as "friend" and "lover." I will attempt to show you in this series how we can be all three; servant, friend and lover.

Let's take a look at Psalm 46:10 in the NASB version:

"Cease striving and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."

You may be more familiar with the version that begins with "be still," but I want to talk about "striving" before we talk about "being."

Let's define the word strive: To exert much effort or energy. To struggle, to contend in opposition, battle, or any conflict. To rival, vie.

In the ministry where I am on staff, strive is the "s" word. Striving denotes a "doing" mentality. In our relationship with the Lord it is not about doing, but being. Doing denotes a theology full of works. Grace is unmerited favor, a gift. Grace can not be earned. Salvation is also a gift, it can not be bought, earned or paid back. It has been my observation although a denomination believes salvation is a gift from God, not of works, many live their lives in contradiction to this truth by "striving."

When it comes to our relationship with the Lord it should be from desire we pursue more intimacy with Him, not so we can meet a quota of Bible reading, prayer and study. When we come to understand how crazy in love with us He is, we WANT to spend time with Him. Time with Him becomes a priority, not a duty. Religion has taught us time with Him is routine, mundane and mechanical. Why have we made relationship with Him something different then what He designed it to be?

Other translations of Psalm 46:10 begin with "be still." Read it like this: Be. Be still. Be still and know. Be still and know that I am God.

I want to propose to you the concept of resting in the Lord. I heard a speaker this past Sunday say, "It's out of rest you wear the enemy out." The enemy is most intimidated, most frustrated and most defeated when we REST in our God given identity...when we KNOW who we are in Christ we are scary to Satan...we can REST in the finished work of the cross KNOWING His yoke is easy and His burden is light.

Here are some things we will address in future posts in this series: What drives us to strive. The cure for ministry burnout. What is our purpose. Expose lies the enemy wants us to believe about serving God. How to deepen your walk with God and become a friend and lover, not merely a servant. How to serve from the overflow of relationship. We will discuss what it means to "know God" as we continue to look at Psalm 46:10. Wow, this is the list I have made so far...who knows where the Spirit will lead. It will be exciting! I hope you join me on the journey!

Knowing my purpose has liberated me in ways I can't express in words. Leading others in discovering their purposes makes MY SOUL SING!

I Don't Know

The other day I was having a conversation with someone who had question after question. They were expecting me to give them answers and quite honestly I didn't have many. My response was repeatedly, "I don't know."

A few days later I had some questions of my own. Frustration began to loom over me and I directed my question(s) to God. What I heard back from Him was simply, "Amy, you don't have to have all the answers."

When I first heard His reply I thought to myself, "ok, great, God says I don't have to have all the answers, now what?" The frustration lifted, but it took a few days for the freedom to come.

I am a huge proponent of self talk, so over the course of the next week I repeatedly said over myself, "Amy, you don't have to have all the answers." The more I said it, the better it sounded and the more freedom it released.

Yesterday, a sweet friend called and wanted to meet for lunch. She was facing some decisions and was somewhat confused about what direction to take. As I was preparing to go meet with her I was talking with Jesus. I told Jesus I was concerned that I didn't have any answers to give her, in fact I only had more questions.

Jesus gently responded to me, "Amy, you don't have to have all the answers." He then went on to reveal to me how the best teachers are not those who lay out all the facts and tell you what conclusion to come to, but rather those who lay out the material and then pose questions to you by which you are led to the answers through discovery.

Before leaving to go to lunch I jumped onto my Facebook to post this as my status: "You don't have to have all the answers. God gave me this word several days ago and I realized this morning it was not just for me, but to be shared."

It never made it to my status, because I heard Holy Spirit say I needed to share this word through a blog post....so here we are.

As we prepare to enter into a new year I am sure each of you have questions of your own. It is my prayer for myself and for each one reading this that 2011 would be a year of learning to trust God more, following His leading and laying on His chest when things look uncertain or a little scary.

Jeremiah 33:3 "Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know."

Our Papa God has ALL the answers and He is waiting for us to come to Him....He wants to reveal His secrets to you and to me. Knowing it is my Abba Daddy's desire to share His heart intimately with me makes my soul sing!

I want to leave you with a song by Kristene Mueller (DiMarco) Happy New Year to each of you, my friends and blog family!

Claim your upgrade!

Rainy days are perfect days for playing "catch up" around the house and for listening to podcasts, worship music and whatever else I find that nourishes my soul in the Lord. I am getting ready to attend a conference in Franklin this weekend with Graham Cooke as the speaker. I love Graham's message on our identity in Christ and so I have been watching/listening to a session of his today.

Helping others discover who they are in Christ and who Christ is in them is one of my heart passions! You can imagine my excitement listening to speakers who teach on this very topic...I get REALLY HAPPY and indeed MY SOUL SINGS!

In this particular message Graham instructs the audience to go through an exercise which I think is AWESOME, LIBERATING and EMPOWERING. I just couldn't wait to share it with you, my blog family:)

Isaiah 54:17 tells us no weapon formed against us will prosper.

Deuteronomy 23:5 tells us God turns curses into blessing simply because He loves us!

Tuck those passages away from future mediation, because they are packed with goodness!

Now, get two sheets of paper (preferably notebook, so you have lines.) On the first sheet of paper make a numbered list of negative aspects in your life, they can be negative emotions, negative situations or negative character traits, curses or sin patterns. It might look something like this:

1. critical

2. depressed

3. alcoholism

4. hopelessness

5. broken relationship

Get the idea? Now after you have completed your list of negatives set that piece of paper aside and take the next sheet and number it the same as the first. For example, if you had 25 things listed on your negative sheet, number your second sheet 1-25.

Isaiah 61:3 is a beautiful and encouraging passage of scripture. It is an example of what God gives us in place of what the enemy tries to saddle us with....a garland instead of ashes, gladness instead of mourning and praise instead of heaviness.

Now, quiet yourself before the Lord and ask Holy Spirit to reveal to you a promise, prophecy, or an "instead of" for each item listed on your negative sheet. This is replacing the enemy's lie with God's truth.

He may give you a scripture reference, or simply one or two words for each. You will know it is from God if it lines up with His character as revealed to us in His Word. What He says will not be negative or condemning! God's words to us always bring Life (seriously, can I get a dollar for every time I have written this in a blog post?)

Using my example list of 5 negative things, my positive, or "instead of," list might go something like this:

1. gift of encouragement and edification

2. joy

3. filled with His Spirit, dependent on Him

4. HOPE and His vision

5. restored relationship

As Holy Spirit leads you spend some time repenting for your part in believing or wallowing in the items on the negative list. If others have been involved in these "curses" choose to forgive them. Curses are not part of your inheritance in Christ, nor are they part of your identity in Him. If you have focused on these negative things you have empowered them in your life. Break agreement with them. To repent means to "turn from." I like how Graham Cooke puts it, "if you have a thought that doesn't line up with His, have another thought." That's repentance, pure and simple! Making the list of truth is you having another thought...His thoughts!

Now, destroy the yucky, negative list. Shred it, flush it down the toilet, however you wish to properly discard of it:) Take the list of truth and declare them over yourself. It could go something like this: (using my example list from above)

"Holy Spirit, I receive the gift of encouragement and edification. I choose to use my words to bless and not curse. I will use my tongue to bring life to others and myself. I choose to be filled with the JOY of the Lord as my strength. I have much to be joyful about, Father, please help me to recognize the joy in my life and focus on Your goodness in all situations. As I walk in the Spirit I ask You to fill me with Your abundance. I will trust in You, Father, to meet the needs of my heart and to fill me to overflowing with Your presence and Your peace. I submit my relationships to You, Lord. May I bring about the spirit of reconciliation and restoration. Give me wisdom Father to know when and with whom Godly boundaries need to be exercised."

Choose to meditate on the list of who God says you are until your actions start lining up with these truths. When you are tempted to go back to the negative pull out your list and declare the truth over yourself again!

Choosing to seek His blessings, His viewpoint, His wisdom and insight will focus your heart and mind on His plan for you. I have seen some people choose to walk in denial of the problems in their life, as if they don't exist. This isn't His solution, nor will it bring about change. Focusing on Him and actively seeking His viewpoint will change YOU, and afterall, YOU are the only person YOU can control anyway:) Focusing on what others are doing, or not doing, never brings about a positive solution....trust me, I've tried that!

Heaven is full of unclaimed UPGRADES! Father God is waiting for you to claim your upgrade! What are you waiting for?

My Soul Sings because I have discovered the lavish love of the Father fully embracing His goodness, basking in His presence and seeking His solutions...now that's an upgrade worth claiming!!!!

Grab and Go Jesus

This post could go in a myriad of different directions...oh wait, I guess all my posts have that potential. Seriously, have you had a conversation with me? Hopefully with Holy Spirit's help I will be able to convey what is on my heart and, more importantly, what is on His.

Many of you know me personally, but many of you do not. This will be one of those posts where knowing me will put you at an advantage. I have been told I write just like I talk, so if you've been reading for awhile you have a pretty good glimpse into my personality...God bless you if you continue to come back:)

We just completed Fall Break 2010 here in the Scenic City (Chattanooga.) My husband took most of the week as vacation. We loaded up the family and headed to the great tourist mecca of eastern Tennessee, aka, Sevier County, Great Smoky Mountains, Little Las Vegas and Gatlinburg.

Where else can you hike, horseback ride, wine taste, eat, go to indoor water parks, zip line, shop, ride go-carts, play unlimited miniature golf and find a "show" on every corner? If that's not enough you can visit any number of Ripley's museums which promise to be the best of the Smokies...I wouldn't know, I've not been to any of them!

I hope I painted a clear picture for those who haven't had the privilege of visiting the Great Smokies. One adjective I would use to describe any trip there is "BUSY!" Now, if you are childless there are plenty of cabins nestled in the woods which offer a place of respite and refreshing...but traveling to Sevier Co., Tennessee with two girls, ages 10 and 14, you aren't going to go to those places...see previous paragraph.

Fast forward to right now, it's 1:14 in the afternoon and I'm coming to you from my bedroom, showered, but in pj pants sitting in the quiet, writing this blog post. The only talking I have done thus far today is communicating with my 10 year old as she got ready for school. The quiet has been blissful.

Please hear me loud and clear, I adore my family. I love to spend time with my husband and our girls, but seriously, we are LOUD! All four of us! When we are all together it is hard to be heard, so we become louder. Now, I'm not saying this is all bad. After all, God gave us our personalities. In the past I tried to change who I was in order to fit a mold I thought people wanted or expected of me. I realized God made me with a voice and I have embraced that voice in the last couple of years...thus the realization of My Soul Sings!

Not too long ago I had an epiphany...I enjoy solitude. This really surprised me at first, because I love people and being with people. If given the option of a quiet Friday night at home or going to dinner with friends, I'd choose the latter most all the time. What I realized is I have the benefit of copious amounts of "me" time. While the girls are in school I am home alone. My days and weeks fill up quickly with ministry and such, but I also have alone time on a daily basis Monday through Friday, with a few exceptions. Having this amount of alone time equates to plenty of Jesus and me time!

Before you jump to conclusions and envision me all pious, let me clarify. Jesus time for me doesn't mean I spend hours reading scripture, or praying, for that matter. It simply means I am aware of His presence with me as I go about my day. Yes, I talk to Him. I most definitely spend time praising and worshiping Him. I also enjoy listening to sermons online, as well as reading the Word.

Last night when I went to bed my thoughts went toward today and the time I would be able to spend with Jesus. I realized I hadn't had much Jesus and me time all week. It made me sad. Think of your dearest friend, now think of the last time you spent with them. Was it today, yesterday, last week or last month? If you answered last month how does that make you feel? Distant, separated, alone? Does it make you crave time with them? If so, why do you crave time with them? Is it because you love how time with them makes you feel? Is it because you love them, cherish them and enjoy the deep heart connection you have with them? Perhaps when you are separated from them you feel incomplete or like you are missing something. This is exactly how I feel when I've not had my Jesus time.

I've been a Christian for most of my life, but that doesn't mean I have always walked in an intimate relationship with Him. In fact, my relationship with the Father, Son and Holy Spirit really began about six years ago. In the past if you had asked me about my quiet time I would have said it was slim to none. From time to time I would be guilted into or feel obligated to spend time reading my Bible and my prayers were short and self-serving at that. Then there were crisis times when I suddenly became "fervent" in prayer, because of desperation and fear. Like I could actually put God in a box, store Him on the shelf, then pull the box off the shelf and blow off the dust when I needed Him...what a prideful way of thinking I had! Pure religion, devoid of relationship, reducing God to a genie in a bottle.

So, maybe you can relate to some of what I just shared and maybe you are wondering what is different now for me. Well, so glad you asked! Relationship, that's the difference. No longer am I fearful of God in a sense of having to perform for Him to meet the mark. Quite the opposite, I am drawn to His goodness. Anything I do for Him I do out of the overflow He has so generously poured into me. I spend time with Him because I want to, not because I need to or should. I praise Him because without a way to express my gratitude and love for Him I just might explode! I talk to Him, because He is my friend and greatest confidant. The more I experience and encounter His heart the more passionately I grow in love with Him.

Let me attempt to tie this all together. Last week represented busyness. Our world as a whole is loud and always on the go...just like I felt our "break" was. Have we become so accustomed to drive thru living that we have equated our time with Jesus, our dearest friend and Savior, to drive thru as well? I'm calling it "grab and go Jesus." Grab and go Jesus makes me sad...it almost makes me sick...I can't help but wonder how it grieves His heart. Unlike the members of my family, Jesus doesn't raise His voice and become louder in order to gain our attention.

One of the reasons I started this blog was a desire to represent Him well. I feel the body of Christ has largely mis-represented God to the world, myself included. The more of the mystery of Christ I uncover, the more I want to share my findings.

In no way is this post meant to bring shame or guilt to anyone. Your time with Jesus is personal. There is no "set" amount of time you should spend with Him. I have discovered the more time I spend with Him, the more I want. As long as I was stuck in the process of "fulfilling the quota" I wasn't living in the fullness of joy being in His presence brings (see Psalm 16:11 NASB.)

We were created to be friends of God. Once you partake of friendship with Him, time with Him becomes a priority, something you purpose to make time for above all else. Last week among the busyness of fall break I didn't purpose to spend time with Him and I was left feeling empty as a result.

Intimacy with the Father is something I love writing about. I hope this post has sparked desire in your heart, or rekindled a flame that may have been smothered out by busyness. Can you hear Him calling you or has He been drowned out by the noise of this world? Spending time with my closest Friend makes my soul sing! I refuse to settle for "grab and go Jesus," what about you?

All you had to do was give it to Me

It has been awhile since I've written a post that is one part confession and one part exhortation:) I pray the Father speaks to you through this personal revelation.

My husband and I joined a small group. It met for the first time last night. This isn't your typical "new" small group because many of us were already in covenant relationship with each other. This level of intimacy allowed us to skip over the formalities and awkwardness of getting to know one another and get right to business. We each were asked to share up to three prayer requests.

As I listened to those who went before me I was thinking of what my requests would be. My thoughts went to several on going prayer needs within my family, but I knew none of these were what the Lord was wanting me to share with the group. He wanted me to get personal and share my heart.

Ironically, it took me awhile to realize what the concern of my heart was. I didn't go to the meeting thinking anything was weighing heavy on my heart. In hindsight I realized I couldn't have been more wrong!

My turn to share came and out of my mouth came an earnest desire of my heart. It was a mama's cry. I can not share the details, but just know it was a burden, one I didn't fully realize the weight of...

We had a time of prayer and left agreeing to lift one another up in the days and weeks ahead.

As I was driving my younger daughter to school this morning I noticed a shift. The very thing I had shared in my request was different this morning. Hmmm? I thought to myself. It was then I heard His voice, "all you had to do was give it to Me." Ding, ding, DUH!

For a brief moment I entertained the condemning thought, "how could you miss that, Amy?" I was quick to go back to the revelation my Daddy had given me...

"All YOU had to do was give it to Me."

"All you had to DO was give it to Me."

"All you had to do was GIVE it to Me. "

" All- you- had- to- do- was- give- it- to- Me."

I consider myself an intercessor. I love to pray. I love to listen for His heartbeat; the heartbeat of heaven and release what I hear the Father say into the environment around me. I love to intercede on the behalf of others. But what I had missed was a personal need. What I realized is I had tried to "fix" it myself. Trying to cope in my strength. How I know this doesn't work! DUH! "All you had to do was give it to Me."

It wasn't that I didn't think God cared about this need, or that He was too busy...it just wasn't on my radar until I spoke it out...when I heard my voice admit to the group this issue was robbing me of peace I knew the gravity of the issue. Living in a place of His peace is something I jealously guard and voraciously treasure. "All you had to do was give it to Me."

In my heart I know the prayer is answered, it's a done deal. The situation is back in His capable hands because I have removed mySELF out of the equation. The burden is where it was meant to be all along...at His feet. He gave me His easy yoke in exchange for my weighty burden! (Matthew 11:28-30)

Perhaps you are reading this and He has brought an issue, situation or need to your mind. Have you given it to Him? Maybe you have given it to Him only to pick it back up? Hopefully you are able to lay it down and leave it at the foot of the cross, remembering there is no limit to how many times you can do so. If you feel like it's been a seemingly never ending cycle, shake off any condemnation and lay it down again...and leave it there. "All you had to do was give it to Me."

Papa, I thank You. I thank You for being accessible 24/7/365. I thank You for longing for me to come to You with the heaviest of burdens and the smallest of burdens, because in Your eyes they are equally important. I thank You for placing me in a community who generally cares about my well being. I thank You I was designed to live in community where transparency brings healing. You are a good and loving Father. You long for me to depend on You, trust in You and come to You. My Soul Sings because all I had to do was give it to YOU!

*If you are personally struggling with a burden and want a safe place to share, I would love to pray for you. You can send me a private message by Facebook:)

Mediocre to Magnificent Part One

If you haven’t read the previous post, take a minute and do so...it will make this one more meaningful.

I can not tell you the day, not even the month or year I realized our marriage had changed. I don’t even remember the circumstances that brought it to my attention. One day I was simply watching my husband and thought to myself, “dang, he’s mine and he’s awesome. I can’t imagine being married to anyone else.”

Shortly after this revelation I was spending some time talking with Jesus when I heard Him speak to my heart, “Amy, I have taken your marriage from mediocre to magnificent.” I couldn’t have put it any other way!

Before we go any further let’s take a trip down Amy and Russell’s memory lane. We don’t have to go all the way to the beginning. Our early years were good, self-centered, but no major roadblocks. We were young and blissfully unaware of life’s trials. It wouldn’t be until shortly after the birth of our second daughter that are marriage vows would be put to the test, in the area of “in sickness and in health.”

Statistically speaking the odds are in our favor. Both sets of parents are still married. Divorce is never something we have ever even flippantly discussed. We both came from the mentality we would be married for life...now, that’s not to say we were going down a road to a life of bliss. In hindsight I can see now it was quite the opposite. We were headed in the direction of co-existing.

I can remember sitting outside at a friend’s house, crying and pouring out my heart to her about our marriage. I didn’t feel we communicated, much less connected on an intimate level. My words to her basically summed up our relationship as roommates, occupying the same space, but not walking in the fullness of covenant God designed marriage to be.

If we had stayed on this path we would be the couple sitting across the dinner table from each other after the girls are grown and gone with absolutely nothing to say. Have you heard of empty nesters who realized a little too late they invested so much time and focus in their children’s lives and not enough in their marriage that when the kids were gone they no longer knew their mate, much less shared any dreams with them? I knew I didn’t want to be that kind of couple, so I set out to do something about it. This is when I realized I had to work on me.

Eventually I decided I wanted more in my relationship with God. I realized I didn’t know God as a loving Father, whom I could intimately know. Somewhere in this timeline God became my number one priority. Although I accepted Christ as my Savior at age six, I really didn’t begin a life changing walk with Him until I was about 31.

Looking back now, this is where my journey began, which brings me to the previous blog post and revelation I am only responsible for me. Let me repeat that, I AM ONLY RESPONSIBLE FOR ME. This is a foundational truth and it applies to you too. You are only responsible for YOU! Get this and you will be on your way to immeasurable freedom. By walking in this truth you will also remove yourself from being an obstacle in the way of God moving in the lives of those you love. He will allow you to play Holy Spirit in the lives of others as long as you choose to do so, but He is waiting for the day you give the job back to Him:)

God started addressing my “junk in the trunk” (and I don’t mean my back side, although there is certainly some junk there too:), no this junk was from the past and it was standing in the way of me fully realizing who I was in Christ. I knew my name, but I didn’t know who I was. As He began to reveal to me my identity I couldn’t get enough of Him. I searched, I prayed, I surrendered and beautiful things started taking place in my heart...and then one day I noticed they were also taking place in my hubby’s heart as well...and I had NOTHING to do with it, other than the fact I had let go of him and placed him in God’s capable keeping!

Transformed lives, transformed thinking and a transformed marriage...in part two of “Mediocre to Magnificent” I will share with you the relationship I now have with my sweet Russell. I don’t share it to brag or boast, but to impart hope to those reading our story...and maybe give you the courage to let go and let God and watch Him bring renewal, restoration and (faithful readers, you probably can guess what comes next) REDEMPTION!

Marriage can be and should be a reflection of how Christ loves the body, His bride...it can be magnificent and this is why my soul sings!

God is always GOOD!

Psalm 63:4, "I will praise You as long as I live, and in Your name I will lift up my hands."

I hope I never tire of proclaiming the goodness of God! As I sit here at the computer to write this post I realize this is a subject I write about often. Focus, priorities, God's goodness, His redemption, His love, living with Him in the abiding place...no matter how you slice or dice it, this is the theme of My Soul Sings.

As I sat down at the computer to type this post I asked God a question. "Why is it You always seem to have me write about Your goodness, focusing on Your redemptive nature?" His reply to me went something like this, "because the world needs to know. They need to know about My goodness. They need to know I am utterly redemptive. They need to know how much I love them. They need to be constantly reminded to keep their eyes on me. Amy, dear, you need to know too."

Don't you just love it when He is right? And, by the way, He is always right!

In a world full of crisis, chaos and sin we need to be reminded, as believers, this should not be our focus. Remember we are in the world, not of it. It should not consume us. Christ left us with the gift of the Holy Spirit and His resurrection power flows through our veins. As believers we hold the solutions to many of the world's problems...but, we can't effectively impact the world if our eyes aren't on Him. If we continue to focus on the negative we will empower it all the more.

Father God isn't sitting high above worried about the state of the world. Quite the contrary, He is waiting for His body to come to Him and ask Him what His solutions are. He isn't wringing His hands hoping His children make the right choices and then writhing in despair when they don't.

The statement I'm about to make is a topic many would like to debate. I am not here to debate it, nor defend it...I merely want to share it with you. I believe the wrath of God was fully poured out onto Christ on the cross. Like the song lyric says, "the wrath of God was satisfied." We won't see the wrath of God again until He pours it out as described in Revelation 6:16.

Amy, are you saying the natural disasters, torment and destruction we are seeing in the world today isn't the wrath of God punishing us for our sinful living? YES, that is exactly what I am saying. Do I believe God could stop them? Yes, I do...but just because He doesn't stop them, doesn't mean they are sent by His hand. Our charge as believers is to humble ourselves and pray as outlined for us in II Chronicles 7:14.

I don't want to camp on this subject, I think to do so would get us into a theological debate in which I am not educated enough to enter. Also, it would be a major bunny trail from the truth I wish to impart through this post. I will say I think believers get stuck on defending their theology to the point it can take our focus off the main thing...sharing the love of Christ with others and empowering people to walk in victory and relationship with the Creator.

I want to shift gears a little at this point. A friend of mine just this week got partial victory over a major storm in her life. All of us have storms, but this was of tsunami proportions. Many people are saying her life will never be the same. I agree with that statement.

Some even go on to say she will never get the pieces of her life back together again...implying her life is partially destroyed because of the devastation done from the "storm." I emphatically DISAGREE with this statement!

During the process I actually found myself believing her life was destroyed, no matter the outcome, that there were no winners. God gently showed me this belief was wrong and was not at all how I should be thinking as a believer in Christ. To believe her life is beyond the restoration and redemption of Christ is like saying there are some issues beyond His power! Remember Satan is not the equal opposite of God. God is absolute! By believing this statement in essence it's like saying this scheme of the enemy is bigger than God...and that, my friends, is absolutely preposterous!

Now...I'm not saying she doesn't have a battle ahead of her. She will be constantly faced with choices. I hope and pray she keeps her eyes on Christ. He has promised to work things together for our good, but our responsibility in this is to look to Him and follow His ways. We must trust Him and surrender to Him.

Let me try to wrap this up and bring it together for application for you and me in our every day lives:)

As believers we have storms. We have problems. We have trials. But, we also have choices. We are given the free will to run to Jesus or run from Him. We have the choice to keep our eyes on Him, or take them off and try to do things our way. We can out rationalize our faith and end up looking at situations with natural eyes as the world does...I've tried this, have you? It leads to discouragement, despair and ultimately, a victim mentality.

Without going into my friend's storm I just want to say I am encouraged by it. Watching it all play out in front of me and the hearing the testimony on this end is amazing. It has definitely increased my faith.

God is true to His promises! I invite you to search your heart and ask yourself what area do you need Him to fulfill His promises to you? Have you taken your eyes off Him? Have you empowered a lie in your situation? Do you believe the wrath of God is being poured out on you...if so, you may want to re-evaluate your thinking and ask Him for an encounter with His love.

I promise you He is not out to "punish" you. Jesus fulfilled the need for punishment. He said on the cross, "it is finished" that was for you and for me...our sins are covered by the blood of Jesus...we don't have to make atonement for them! This, my friends, is the gospel of Christ!

Father God, I pray for each person reading this post. I ask You to encounter them each individually and personally. Wrap them in Your perfect peace, grace, love and mercy. May they know you not only in head knowledge, but in the heart. I thank You Papa for sending us Jesus. I thank You we don't have to make atonement for our sin. I thank You for desiring a relationship with us free from striving. I thank You that You are always good and loving toward all You have made. I repent Lord for areas in which I have made you smaller than my problems, than the world's problems. Show me Lord Your solutions so I may be a problem solver, not a problem maker or problem enabler. I praise You Lord for all You have done and all You are doing in my life. I will sing of Your love forever as long as I have breath! I love You, my Daddy! I thank you for making my soul sing! AMEN!

Oh Focus, Where Art Thou?

I am starting to wonder if the name of this blog should have been "Confession Central." Seems like I do quite a bit of soul sharing and confessing on here and this post is no different.

I lost my focus. Never fear, I found it, if I hadn't I wouldn't be writing this post.

Some of you may or may not know what your focus is. I have blogged before about my priorities. To sum them up again they go in this order, God, my husband, my children, friends and ministry.

Focus and priorities for me are related, but not necessarily one in the same. For the last few years my focus has been on God and my relationship with the Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit. When I am in right relationship with the Godhead my priorities and other relationships come into order as well.

When I say I lost my focus I mean I took my eyes off God. You may be asking what exactly does that look like? For me to be focused on God is to constantly view things through Kingdom lenses. The circumstances in the natural often look bleak, discouraging and hopeless. When we focus on what we see in the natural we empower lies to work, as we lose sight of God's truth. It is my desire to filter circumstances in my life and the lives of those I love through the eyes of God.

This can mean I seek a precedent from scripture or it can be as simple as asking Him how He views a situation. Viewing life through Kingdom lenses has empowered me to walk in victory, satisfaction and peace; as well as, providing Kingdom solutions to the trials and problems I face in day to day life.

As a friend told me today I have an addictive personality...thanks sister, I felt so edified by this comment:) Just kidding...she is right. I've never had a substance addiction, but when I am passionate about something it usually turns into an obsession/addiction...it becomes what I live and breath for.

Now, before you go and assume this is a negative trait of mine I invite you to look at how this can be a good attribute. Followers of this blog should know by now I am constantly looking for the redemptive value in EVERYTHING!

As I have grown in my relationship with God I have become absolutely obsessed with Him. This has effected me in a wonderful way as I am now living in great freedom. I am obsessed with worship, prayer, study and ministry. My passion and love for Jesus drives me to share my relationship with others, hopefully imparting a little piece of the Kingdom to those who are seeking it...and hopefully without spiritually throwing up on them uninvited...if I have crossed this boundary with anybody reading this please accept my apologies...I just get excited sometimes:) Most of the time my God obsession is a good obsession!

But, when I lose my focus I can easily fall into a snare of the enemy, becoming obsessed with other things that aren't healthy for me or my family. Before we go any further in this post I want you to hear me say this is my story, and it may be quite different from yours.

I want to confess and explain what it looks like when I lose my focus...not that I'm proud of it, I am not.

When I take my eyes off God I always get incredibly grumpy, highly agitated and easily frustrated. The peace I am accustomed to walking in goes right out the window.

Isaiah 26:3 from the Message, "People with their minds set on You, You keep completely whole, steady on their feet, because they keep at it and don't quit."

When I lose my focus and my eyes aren't on Him my life turns into a whirlwind and chaos reigns in my home. When I am on a focus sabbatical (tee-hee) I don't spend much time with God, my prayer life is brief and self-centered, and I hardly open the Word. What happens when you don't water a plant? It withers. Visual learners that was for you:) What happens when you go a long time without talking with a friend? You lose contact.

Fast forward to this morning. I knew I had lost my focus. I also realized I had some pretty intense repentance I needed to do. In my circles we call this "doing kingdom business." Nailed down and simply put I had placed other obsessions over my relationship with God and that, my friends, is idolatry.

As I sat on my bed with my Bible and journal in front of me I closed my eyes and tried to connect with the Father...nothing...silence...hello God, are you there? Now I know good and well He is there, He never leaves...dang it, I knew it was serious business when I had to start confessing and repenting before I even felt Him close. You people know how much I love His presence, to not be able to immediately connect with Him for me is pure torture.

He has already revealed to me the redemptive side of me temporarily experiencing the break in connection...because, He is, after all, ridiculously redemptive and doesn't waste the opportunity to use anything to teach us and grow us up in the faith.

Stay tuned for a blog post soon about restoring your heart to heart connection with Father God. Until next time I hope your soul sings because the Father passionately loves you and longs for an intimate relationship with you!

Priorities and My Life

I just wanted to pop in and say hi to all my blog friends! I usually try to post 2-3 times a week, but this week it just didn't happen.

My excuse for not starting a blog earlier was I felt it would pressure me too much. My old people pleaser traits try to rear their ugly heads from time to time. So, when I began this blog I made a commitment to put my time with God first, then hubby, children, friends and outside ministry (in that order.)

I say "outside ministry" meaning ministry outside of my home. As a mother and wife, my first ministry is to my family...those of you with small children it's okay if they are your ONLY ministry for this season of life.

Jesus said "If anyone gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones because He is my disciple, I tell you the truth, he will certainly not lose his reward." (Matthew 10:42) Moms, have you given your child something to eat or drink today? If so, you have served Jesus by serving your (His)children. I would also like to add, as a mom you are an invaluable asset in the kingdom of God. You are sowing into a future generation of revivalists, leaders and kingdom warriors!

This truth took me awhile to grasp. I felt I had to be serving in the "church," and so I said yes to everything and way over committed myself. My relationship with God and my family suffered for it.

My Soul Sings falls into the category of outside ministry, so it's the first thing to go when the other priorities are calling to me.

This weekend I have enjoyed time with my daughters and my hubby. I did some rubber stamping (it's a craft thing, for those of you wondering) with my 10 year old this afternoon. She made a comment that so touched my heart I shared it on my Facebook and I plan to blog about it this coming week. Children are capable of imparting some great wisdom, and that was surely the case with her sweet remark.

As you have read this I hope it has encouraged you to think about where your priorities are. It's good to make sure they are in check from time to time...because it doesn't take much for them to go askew. I don't usually realize this has happened until something suffers.

If I haven't had my alone time with Jesus I start to feel completely separated from Him. Instead of talking with Him throughout my day, I feel He isn't there...but really, it's me that has left, because He doesn't go anywhere:)

When I've not spent enough time with my husband we are more prone to arguments. Same goes with my girls, if their love tanks aren't full there will be more disobedience, disrespect and overall mood changes. I think you get the point.

It's not a coincidence when I've spent time with Jesus the rest of my relationships seem to run more smoothly. I contribute this to my heart being in the right place, connected and focused on the Giver of Life...I am, in turn, able to give life and love to others...which has become one of my core values. I want to give, love, minister and serve from the overflow and abundance God has given me, otherwise someone will get shorted because it is a fleshly effort, not empowered by the Spirit of God.

Wow, to have come here just to say hi, I sure did ramble! Apparently the Holy Spirit had something to say through all this! I pray a blessing over your week. May it be full of love and time in His presence so you can ooze His love on those you love most...because His presence always makes My Soul Sing!

I'm Not Who I Was

This isn't a new post, but an article I wrote in December of 2008 for Growing in Grace Ministries website. I have several articles posted on GGM's website and you can read them by going here.

I've had recent conversations with friends who have known me for several years. One in particular met me at the lowest point of my life. She has watched me go from a bitter, empty woman to a Spirit filled, transformed, work of God. It was good talking with her about who I was and who I've become because I never want to take for granted who I am today and the grace of God to get me here. It was painful, cost me dearly and was not at all easy....BUT, it has been so worth every minute!

When women come to me wanting to know what I did to get "here" I share with them how I had to come before the Lord completely broken. For those looking for a quick fix, I'm sorry there is no such thing. Being healed and changed by Papa God takes time and it takes looking into your heart at things that are ugly. But if you allow Him to take you there I promise He does it so gently. You will never be the same once you've encountered the sweet love of Jesus. IT'S A LIFE LONG PROCESS and I'm still on the journey:) But once I started the process I realized I was to far into it to turn back to old ways...it simply was too costly to go back.

One thing I desperately need you to hear me say is this...I have not arrived, I am far from perfect, my transformation is on going. I only share my story in hopes of helping other women (or men) discover who they are in Christ. If my breakthrough can bring someone else into their breakthrough it is worth every minute of transparency to me. I believe it's my very purpose in life...or at the very least, my passion!

I'm Not Who I Was

originally published 12-08

Some recent events in my life have led me to ponder the concept of change. There is a song coming to mind by Christian artist Brandon Heath called "I'm Not Who I Was." If you get a chance you can listen to the song here.

Who was I ten years ago? I was a stay at home mom of a toddler and a newborn. I was a wife, daughter, a sister, a friend and a child of God who didn't know her identity in Christ. I was an occasional pew warmer. I was barely existing...and I didn't even realize it. Being created for a purpose never even crossed my mind. I was also wounded and you, my friend, at some point in your journey have experienced woundedness too...and what do wounded people do? They wound. I've been wounded, but I've also wounded...and so have you.

By this point you're thinking, "wait a minute! I come here for words of encouragement, not to be told I'm wounded and I wound!" I'm getting to that, just stay with me a little while.

It was recently revealed to me why a relationship in my past came to an abrupt end. I went several years without knowing what I had said or done to cause this friend to completely disconnect from me. When I found out what her reason was for ending the friendship I was devastated.

Without going into great detail, let's just say I was an extremely negative person. I didn't even know it, being negative was so much a part of my identity. Do you know anyone like that? They just aren't fun, are they? I loved, but my definition of love was so limited. I had religion, (which we've talked about before) but what I was missing was relationship. It's through relationship with Christ where we experience love, we in turn can give love. Simply put...you can't give what you don't possess.

In looking back we both wounded each other. I wounded her simply by reacting to life out of my pain. She, in turn, wounded me by rejecting and abadoning me. What's sad in this situation is she isn't open to reconciliation. I have tried, in the only way I can, to ask her forgiveness. Unless circumstances change she will never know this side of heaven I have changed. I'm not who I was.

Okay, so we've established we aren't the same. It doesn't matter if you go back 20 years, 10 years, 5 years, or 5 months chances are there have been changes and; hopefully, if you are living a surrendered life, they are changes for the better.

Consider II Corinthians 3:18, "And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into His likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit." The King James uses the word changed instead of transformed. The text indicates it is a process of being transformed or changed, meaning it is ongoing.

There's a life lesson here...when isn't there?! In my state of pondering...hmmm...let's change that to processing, I was seeking the Lord. The wound had been reopened and it stung. I knew the Lord would bring about something good from this pain, if I would only give it to Him. Remember, it always requires action on our part. I cried out to Him (literally), "I don't want this, it's ugly and it hurts and your Son died on the cross for it. It's not mine! Take it!" He gently led me to repentance and forgiveness...again! His words to me were sweet comfort. He said, "Amy, Amy, Amy don't go back to that way of thinking. You've come too far to go back to old ways. I don't see you as a negative person. I've called you to be an encourager, to bring about restoration and healing to the broken hearted. I've made beauty from ashes and my gifts to you are irrevocable. I loved you far too much to leave you the way you were. Everything I've done for you is because I love you dearly."

I processed His words and more revelation came. You see when we are still and we listen, He speaks! Again He was gentle, not condemning. I imagine He had a smile on His face and a laugh in His voice when He asked me this, "How many people have you judged based on who they were 20, 10, or 5 years ago?" There's the ouch! You knew it was coming, didn't you?

I've recently started a Facebook. Those of you familiar with Facebook know it's a great networking tool. It enables you to connect with peers, friends, family and old classmates. As you build your network it will suggest friends you might know based on your current connections, school affiliations, etc. Within a few days high school classmates starting popping up on my "people you may know list." It's amazing at what you remember about people..."he was a drunk, she was popular, he was really nerdy, she was really quiet, he was fat, she was homely, he was a jock, and so on." What I had failed to consider was how people have changed...Papa God was merely pointing it out to me. Amy, you aren't the only one who has changed! DUH! I was looking at the list of names based on who they were eighteen (now twenty) years ago!

I'm not who I was! Can I get an AMEN? I bet most of us can humbly claim we aren't who we use to be. I am extremely grateful my Savior loves me so much He can't leave me where I was! I praise Him for training me to see people how He sees them. He sees beyond the pain, the bitterness, the wounds and negativity. He sees the person they can become! He sees the person His Son hung on the cross, bled, died and rose victoriously for! When we look at people through His eyes we are not only reminded of where we've been and how far we've come, but on their potential too! Maybe all they need to start their journey of transformation is a kind word from you.

I pray as you've read this the Holy Spirit has brought someone to your mind and reminded you they aren't who they were and neither are you!

END OF ORIGINAL ARTICLE

I share this post with you because it lays a foundation for future topics we will discuss on My Soul Sings. You can't fully understand who I am today, until you know where I've been. I'm not who I was and this certainly makes My Soul Sing!